My mind is pretty much blown.

By today.

We had a teaching on worship today and I really got alot out of it. I never realized how reverent and in awe I should be while I worship God. He is so worthy of it and I never give Him enough honor. I need to acknowledge Him and grow deeper in Him. During the morning time God really told me to search after Him, and that's when I'll find him. When I dig deeper then I know how.

So tonight we had a worship time that was really amazing. We paired up with the school of worship which is always really amazing. God has definitely anointed them.
Anyways, they made a prayer "Tunnel" sort of thing, where the SOW went on both sides and made a sorta tunnel thing and we walked through it while they prayed for us. After coming out of it, I started singing in tongues which is something I've never really done before or always felt silly doing. I don't think I've ever sung so loud in my life. I was praying for people and got a word for a girl, which was really encouraging.
Then I sat back down and my friend Nathan came and started praying for me. He prayed for me along the lines of saying God was going to break me until I couldn't survive without Him holding me together. I guess thats always been a hopeful thought in my head but I didn't exactly want it.
So I started to pray for that, and I really physically felt a melting of my heart.

"My beloved, you have lived in despair for too long. Taste the freedom I want to give to you."

I didn't even want to cry and be emotional for once in my life. I shed a few tears, but I couldn't stop smiling until the worship was completely over. My jaw literally felt like I couldnt move it from a smile. I felt joy and completeness like I never have felt before.

God really showed me areas that He is going to change on this DTS, but I'm almost thrilled about it. I want God to change me and mold me in anyway possible.